As a child of the cold war (circa 99 Red Balloons not The Manchurian Candidate) I can’t help but be a little intimated by Moscow. Should I be? Well, they make it hard to get to, tickets to the top sights can be complicated, lots of the best sights don’t allow any pictures and are filled with menacing security guards enforcing those rules, and if you don’t pay attention to the regulations around your visa, watch out! (Hey American tourists–think about the poor American embassy personnel who have to deal with your f*!k-ups at 3:00 am and pay attention to visa regulations!)
Even when the embassy is closed, a staff member is always on call to help American citizens in distress. Here’s Ana at the Moscow Four Seasons filling out paperwork for two women who overstayed their visas. (We were en route to Lenin’s Tomb and the Four Seasons was the closest open establishment that could provide us with a table and a pen. And a $10 cup of coffee.)
But not a single towering Russian told me they must break me and with some advance planning and a metro map (Yandex app!) Moscow is pretty awesome.
My first stop was the Kremlin. What exactly is the Kremlin? I’m ashamed to say I didn’t know. You hear “the Kremlin” and know it means the government just like “the White House” does. But what is it? if you’d asked me a few months ago, I maybe would have said, “Hmmm…I know the square with St. Basil’s in it is Red Square. Are they the same thing?”
For all who already knew, good on you. For anyone like me who has lived their life in ignorance…
“Kremlin” means walled fortress. The Moscow Kremlin, containing several cathedrals and palaces used by the Tsars, is only the most famous of many Russian Kremlins.
Troitskaya Tower entrance into the Kremlin
After Lenin moved the capital back to Moscow he decided to live in the complex, as did Stalin. Today the Grand Kremlin Palace is the official state residence of the president. With all those Tsars and Soviet heads of state within the walls, “the Kremlin” became a synonym for the seat of the government à la “the White House”
Sadly, you can’t visit the Grand Kremlin Palace without special permission but the cathedrals and Armoury Museum, which houses loads of Russian treasure, are open for visitors.
One can, and I did, buy advance tickets for Armoury and cathedrals. Only on site can you buy an add-on ticket to see the Diamond Fund, aka the Russian crown jewels. If they are not sold out. They were. Sigh. You may also want a ticket to go up into the Ivan the Great bell tower; those tickets are only available 45 minutes before a timed tour and require leaving the main complex, purchasing a ticket, and then re-entering. They clearly don’t want anyone to get that ticket. I didn’t.
NO PICTURES ALLOWED inside the heavily frescoed cathedrals and the Armoury so you’ll have to imagine my bewildered delight at seeing the Fabergé egg with a miniature trans-Siberian express inside where the train is made of gold and platinum and has diamonds for headlights. Rich people find some seriously weird ways to spend their money.
Right outside the Kremlin walls is Red Square with the iconic St. Basil’s cathedral and Lenin’s mausoleum where, against his wishes, the founder of the Soviet state remains embalmed and on display. My friend Ana, who grew up under Tito’s communism, was game for queuing up to see the morbid comrade. While I made fun of myself for wanting to see this, and I do think it’s creepy, I can honestly report that it’s very well done and feels quite respectful.
It’s free to go in, although lines are long. No photos are allowed inside the mausoleum but in the area immediately outside you can take pictures. They let maybe 20 people in at a time and while that does slow the line it also means you never feel like you are in a throng of other tourists jockeying for selfie space. Instead, from the approach, you get amazing views of Red Square while removed from the crowds.
Inside is very basic. Lenin lies in a dark and cold room and he looks like a mannequin. He’s dressed in a suit and is shorter than I pictured but that may be an illusion as a blanket covers his legs. I stood in some wonder: this is the Vladimir Lenin. Security guards make sure you stay respectful and don’t take pictures. On the way out you pass the outer wall of the Kremlin, lined with the graves of other Soviet leaders.
Main take away: this is the set up I want after I die.
St. Basil’s does allow pictures, as does the nearby Chambers of the Romanov Boyars museum, a house where the Romanovs lived and they think the first Romanov Tsar was born in 1596.
For whatever reason, when I think of Baroque architecture I don’t think of Moscow. Yet I walked through the streets around Red Square and if I’d been beamed directly into them without knowing where I was, I would have guessed Vienna.
Baroque (Rococo?) Moscow
It wasn’t all dead communists and churches. Moscow has some lovely leisure spaces. The most famous is Gorky park but I also stopped by Izmailovsky, a lunatic flea market/theme park, and ВДНХ (VDNKh), a Soviet-era fairground that mixes green space and fountains and cosmonaut statues and ornate pavilions dedicated to all the different SSRs. Kazakhstan’s was quite nice.
All the scene changes meant I extensively rode the rails of Moscow’s wildly convenient and efficient metro. Never run for a train. Another one is coming in three minutes max. It’s the most impressive public transportation system I’ve ever encountered, and the most aesthetically pleasing.
My quick trip left me interested in, and not scared of, coming back. Courtesy of the invitation from the U.S. Embassy, my visa is good for 3-years. OR…I could move there? On that Friday our second tour bid list came out. Ana and I spent the rest of the weekend obsessing over the options presented. More later about bidding but for a bunch of reasons, Moscow is high on my list.
In Foreign Places 